I think best at 3:00 AM

The time right now is 3:09:00 AM on Wednesday 12/30/09.

I miss her so much. I have been a horrible friend. She needed me so badly, but I already moved on. I failed to realize that, yes, I am not in love with her, but yes, I am her friend.

I miss the two minute hugs.

I miss the way she looks at me and tells me that everything will be okay.

I miss the soft smile that digs into my heart and makes me blush like a child.

I miss the look on her face when I tease her.

I miss the late nights thinking of her.

I miss the video chats.

I miss the way she blushes when I pour my heart out into a single A.I.M.

I miss the first time we flirted, the day inside the movie theater watching UP. I realized how wonderful this girl was, so I moved my hand an inch towards hers. I felt her soft skin on my fingers and the goosebumps took over. At first, she pretended not to notice, but then I felt her hand pushing back onto mine. She grabbed my hand, a symbol of friendship or love (two completely different emotions), and it all went on from there.

I never returned her gift, a light kiss on the cheek before leaving her house after a very important day. I still want to.

I miss her and want her back into my life, but things are different now, and I can not expect perfect results. Wish me luck reader, I might not come out of this one.

The time right now is 3:24:30 AM on Wednesday 12/30/09.

My Own Little Poems

These are a few original poems I wrote at 1:00 A.M.

The doctor said it was too late

The surgeon said he has never seen anything so shattered.

I guess I'll never get my heart fixed.

When I smile, they run. And when I laugh, they scream

But when I love, they brake me...piece by piece

I was going to send you my heart for Christmas.

But my friends talked me out of it.

They said "Why would you send her something broken?"

Boy likes girl, girl likes boy.

Boy loves girl, girl hates boy.

When he gives you the world,

He only wants one thing back;

Love

I wish you would've told me.

Then my heart would be split in two.

Not two hundred.

When I close my eyes, I see her.

When I open my eyes, she's gone.